“I am free.”

Say, “I am free.”

And don’t you forget it.

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I heard that at a conference last weekend, an event that packed all the fire of courage with all the ether of kindness. There was so much love in the city during those two days that it followed me all the way home. I can’t shake it—this feeling that we are all connected. To find myself in the presence of so many lightworkers was a gift that I will cherish forever.

Words fail to describe it. How unusual.

No Expectations

The funny thing about letting go is that there is always another level.

Last October—a year ago nearly to the day—I determined to learn the true meaning of trust. How would my life change if I simply let go of my expectations? All the control I thought I needed, all the plans I thought were foolproof, all the quick fixes that had saved me over and over again. What if I just… dropped them?

It was difficult at first. I didn’t feel much like myself until February. And then, practically overnight, everything changed.

There was the old lightness in my chest. There was the joy in rising with the sun. Here was the belief that even in the uncertainty, divine timing was at work.

Goodness began flowing to me in a river, so effortless that I laughed. Who was that woman who was masquerading as me back in the fall? I was not a fan of her at all. Was she truly gone? No matter.

I can lock her out.

And I did. In fact, I loved this newfound sense of freedom so much that when I closed the door on my “old self,” I locked all the goodness inside with me. It felt like letting go of expectations. I would trust the flow, and the flow would bless me for it.

Ah, yes. Freedom.

The Illusion of Allowing

Do you see what I did there?

I will trust you to bring me exactly what I want.

You can let go of literally every other expectation in the book, but if you still have this one, you have released nothing. Which is not meant to condemn. I didn’t put this together until this week.

For an entire year, I allowed myself to… well… “allow.” Unless it was uncomfortable, or scary, or outside the realm of my plans. The flow is swift, and the flow is deep, and it only works if I can harness it. Isn’t that interesting? Infinite Intelligence needs my help to function properly.

An illusion, all of it. I can hear my soul giggling. Finally! I have so much to tell you!

True allowing, trust, letting go of expectations—none of it requires control. And the Universe will stop at nothing to inform you of this fact. Crazy, right? But this is the essence of love, of joy, of peace. Do less, do nothing, do less than nothing.

Stop.

Letting Go for Real

This is one of those topics I could go on about forever, so I will get to the point.

Letting go is not comfortable—for me anyway. It takes a lot of energy to throw wrenches in your own day, to interrupt stressful thought patterns. To step away from the wheel.

But maybe control is an illusion, too. Maybe listening becomes easier when you aren’t always trying to conduct an unruly orchestra. Maybe there is a divine order to everything. I heard that last weekend, too.

There is a real possibility that letting go feels heavy right before it feels light. There’s a chance that our connection to others deepens when we stop—and I mean really stop—expecting certain things from them. Drawing on a whopping five days of experience, I can honestly say I feel chaotic, but hopeful. Last night, I closed one of the books I’m reading and sat in total silence for maybe 30 seconds. No white noise, no mental chatter—nothing. I can’t remember the last time I experienced that. Maybe never.

“One must let go in order to be free,” according to my calendar. (It’s from The Universe Talks. It is magic.)

I know there is a level beyond this, but for now, I am here. Putting my hands on my heart and saying—

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“I am free.”

Say, “I am free.”

And don’t you forget it.